Adversity and Jupiter Transit-

Adversity turns a lot of non believers into believers. I have always maintained that when you are struggling in life, then turning towards god and believing in luck is showing weakness and probably has counter effects (it brings doubt in your mind and there is nothing more hollowing than self doubt). Instead turn towards them when you are flying high and you will witness miracles beyond your imagination!

P.S. Jupiter started it's transit in the house of Leo this July 17th and will remain there for the next 1 year. It has moved from house of Cancer where it was exalted to a house where Sun is exalted. Not a big deal (it is not the house of the enemy, it is indeed a house of a harsh planet however). Depending on how Sun and Jupiter is positioned in your horoscope together with which moon sign you belong to, will dictate how this time period will go for you. Also something to keep in mind is that Lord Saturn continues to stay in house of Scorpio which in my humble opinion kind of mitigates the effect of Jupiter on either side (good or bad).

Last and not the least - hope trumps every planet and every god in the world!

MA   

Alarm Substitute-

So I was in Tokyo recently and for some reason the hotel ran out of converters for phone chargers. Now - since I was on roaming and not that anybody calls me, the phone itself wasn't that important but what it did serve a purpose for was the alarm in the morning! Given I had meetings in the morning, I couldn't really afford to get late - I went back to basics.

Long time back, when I was a kid, I had a massive problem of not being able to get up in the morning. My mom used to wake me up with great difficulty and this went on till as late as my under grad days. I literally couldn't hear alarms - no matter how loud they were or how many were set. Multiple alarms were tried - they came and they went but I just couldn't get up! She then gave me her secret tip. Now I will warn you that this might sound silly or attempt at a joke or just plain frivolous BUT this is anything but that. She told me if you just talk to your pillow and tell it that you need to get up by such and such time, the pillow will 100% nudge you at that exact time for that fleeting moment and that really tiny winy quick window will exist when you will open your eyes at the very time you wanted to wake up. Now it is really up to you after that whether you go back to sleep or you don't act upon it because this trick doesn't have a "snooze" option.

I did try this in Tokyo, it worked. It was magical. 6:30 AM bang, i was up! This works. Try it. I can guarantee this works. For the smart a$$es who have the question that what do we do if we don't use a pillow - I don't know, go figure it out!

MA 

Back in london-

This is the happiest place on earth! Saw chelsea cloisters where i first stayed 10 years back.

MA

EQ-

Increasingly there is a new buzz word - "EQ". Emotional Quotient. Obviously in the context of "IQ". Intelligence Quotient.

EQ is nothing, it is a sign of weakness, people who have high EQ are essentially those who don't have high IQ and hence need something to show that they should be considered worthy of something too and hence they made up a term called EQ.

The above was fairly obvious but there is now a second degree of mind game getting played by high IQ people (as if just being high IQ wasn't enough to satisfy their huge egos) - they keep saying they are a fan of  high EQ. They crave it and call it more important than IQ. They pretend to be jealous of high EQ people. They wish they could exchange their IQ for EQ. This is all to make low IQ people feel better about themselves, positive affirmation.

It is high time people realize - there are only 2 kinds of people in this world, high IQ and low IQ. You can't just invent a term, a new category to make yourself feel relevant.

P.S I am a fairly low IQ person but I refuse to take support of "EQ" to show that I am useful, or in any way better than anyone else.

MA

Feminism-

People keep asking me why I hate feminism. I don't hate women and neither do I have a problem with them. But I do have a problem with anything which divides people and which eggs people on to fight against each other. Be at constant war against each other. That is what feminism is doing these days. It doesn't teach that women are equal, anymore. It teaches that women need to rule over men, they are superior to men and that all men are bad. What is the difference then in any fundamentalist religion and feminism?
FYI - I have an equal problem with chauvinism that say men are greater than women etc etc. Why is there a talk of inequality at all? Why not teach people to exist in peace and with love?

MA

Extraordinary-

Saw the movie "Imitation Game" and realized that some people are so lucky to live such extraordinary lives but the biggest tragedy is that they never realize it. Or may be they do but the people surrounding them make their achievements look trivial and make them look inconsequential. I can only hope that one day I will be given a chance to do something which will be remotely useful and may be, just may be important for someone rather than just existing and living my otherwise pathetic useless waste of a life!

MA

Singapore-

Every time i visit Singapore, i come back with mixed feelings and a lot of anger. It is a great city, clean, no pollution, relaxed and without a doubt: a sense of chillness/ laziness about it which has "less productivity" written all over it (which i love btw).

I went on business so while meetings went well, everything non business was like always difficult and strange about this city. People are so different, they are just not normal. They seem to live in a cocoon and are oblivious to anything other than their lives. May be i am jealous of this and the fact that people are so happy while rest of us normal mortals are so miserable!

MA

Baby-

Saw the movie "Baby" last night. I am impressed, witty and tight screenplay and one of the better bollywood movies I have seen in a long time. As I was discussing with a friend, we agreed on something which I found remarkable - it is our responsibility to make movies like Baby a hit. If people don't turn up in theatres to watch this but instead watch Happy New Year, then automatically those are the kind of movies that will get made all the time!

I was talking to my mom and she said "gaane bhi nahin hain? Phir kya fayda, 3-4 songs hon to mazaa aayega!". This needs to be changed and the onus is on the viewers who want to see that change in the Bollywood movies. I am going to publicize this movie by word of mouth aggressively.

P.S the time of Jacqueline Fernandez is here! I said that about Deepika pre cocktail and it happened. Watch out for JF!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVl3om0-GFE

MA

Top 5 movies of all time-

Someone at work asked me my top 5 movies of all time that I have seen. Got me thinking, here is the list and why I like them (in no particular order)-
Fight Club - Script, Concept, Screenplay
Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - Unbelievable editing
Inception - Screenplay, Concept
Memento - Concept, Screenplay
Old Boy (original Korean version) - Original script

Atleast this is what I could think of after careful deliberation of 1 day.
Some notable mentions-
Shawshank Redemption
Prince of Egypt
The Dark Knight
12 Angry Men
Godfather 2

P.S.
I think Chris Nolan is easily the best director of this generation and arguably the best in last 70 years. I think he beats Copolla, Zemeckis, Steven Soderbergh, Clint Eastwood, David Russell etc easily and David Fincher marginally. The difference between their movies is that script is much stronger for Fincher BUT the screenplay and execution of Nolan fkking beats the crap out of any other director! He also uses Hans Zimmer brilliantly, much better use of soundtracks then anyone else.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxabLA7UQ9k

MA 

Getting beaten-

I have realised that i don't feel bad when i am beaten unfairly or when i lose because of some bias, cheating etc.
I feel bad only when i am beaten fair and square. When i know the other guy was the better guy. When i know in all honesty that i was the inferior one and no matter how hard i try, unless god / luck smiles on me, i am gonna get my ass handed over to me.

This has happened to me every two years when i am made to remember my "aukaat". I guess i should learn to know my place before 1 day, god stops being generous and madari sir's premonition that "abe tu hai kaun? Tata hai, ambani hai? Tu peon hai and bada hoke wahi rahega" comes true.

MA

As baba SRK says in Chak De-

"Har team mein sirf ek hi gunda ho sakta hai" (any team can have just 1 bully and rest have to tow the line). I am actually in awe of this concept. This is very true in real life or atleast most of the situations that i face in my mine:
1) Work - as soon as there is crisis of authority, team doesn't know whom to follow or the people start doubting the head of the team, it is chaos. There can be just 1 gunda there and it better be him if he wants people to follow him and get stuff done
2) Poker table - every table has that 1 over aggressive, constant blinds stealer whom everyone is scared of
3) Every relationship / marriage - 1 of the 2 has the upper hand, the person who cares less will automatically become the dominant. Fundamental rule of marriage / relationships!

P.S the movie Chak De is phenomenally insightful
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4wLYOGi148

MA

Sad but it doesn't make sense...

So now that the Test match series between India and Australia has started after the very sad demise of Phil Hughes, I thought the focus would be back on cricket but media has turned it into a story of courage. And that courage is displayed by whom? the Australian batsmen who were among runs in this match. I don't understand why? or how is that courage?

I mean no disrespect to Phil Hughes here but I seriously do not think that David Warren or Michael Clarke showed any extra courage or should be given any extra credit for making a century on a test match which followed Hughes death. Are they related? Are they family? What are they? Nothing, just team mates. Shit happens, move on. I am sure 1 month down the line, none of these "teammates" are going to face the loss which Hughes family has to bear every single day now. They are the real courageous people, they are showing true character by cancelling the State funeral because they thought enough propaganda has already happened around this.

If this is courageous, then I show courage everyday. Hell, fkking every other person shows courage every single day because am sure someone would have died someday or the other somewhere whom he knew, but he goes on with his life and manages to get by the day doing his regular work. If David Warren is courageous, then Sachin is another league all together when in World Cup, after his father died, he returned to crack a century against Kenya. That is being courageous and not this psuedo muppeting around nonsense.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCvdFvqXsCY

MA 

Concept of power-

Increasingly power in banking has moved towards concepts like division, isolation, exclusivity and "breaking" up things, breeding disloyalty and invariably it has ultimately hurt the person trying to get powerful through these means. What happened to "strength in numbers", "power is in bringing people together and not in breaking up people"?

My point of view is obviously limited to very few firms and only a limited number of years in work experience but I think I would find it safe to assume that this is happening at more than 70% desks/banks/teams. Of course a lot of it is driven by the circumstances, current economy situation and the deep shit the banks find themselves in BUT post 2009, I think a lot of the measures taken on HR/personnel front have just acted as a counter and taken everything backwards.

I think till HR policies and desk manager's approach does not start leaning towards bringing people together and greater transperancy in the allocation of sub-power and it's consequences, there would always be under performance in the team (by individuals and by the whole team).

Managers need to realise that the very people they are trying to divide, are the resource / key to their success. The very goal that has been eluding them is due to their own doing, their myopic point of view is the 75 percent reason of them losing power in next 3 years if not sooner.

MA

Irish Exit-

I had this bad habit of disappearing after a couple of drinks every time I am out with my friends. I would excuse myself to go to the washroom and then just leave without telling people. And on top of it, I would switch off my cellphone and just go quiet for rest of the weekend (it was a usual phenomenon on Friday late nights). So much so that couple of my friends nick named me "Cinderella" and for the longest time I thought it was because I was cool as Russel Crowe's character in the movie "Cindrella Man" :)

Now I have obviously improved after constant feedback but recently some of my office colleagues pulled the stunt on me and I got to know it is called the "Irish Exit"

MA 

New found respect...

for Sajid Khan and Shakti Kapoor. Saw a play in HK called "Mid Summer Night Dreams" and it was so poorly produced, screen played, scripted and acted that my "Jungle Book" of 7th grade stood out like Schindler's List in front of it!

The comedy was so slapstick and non comic that Shakti Kapoor in Chaalbaaz with his "main nanna sa, munna sa bacha hoon" dialogue might come across hilarious. Equally Sajid Khan's "Humshakals" is looking like an academy award winning masterpiece.

On top of this, the play was so overpriced! And there was no popcorn or hotdog either!

And worst was - as we were exiting the theater (or joke of a theater), I overheard 2 English ladies talk to each other how wonderful the play was and how they will get their kids to come watch it. Utter bull shit!!! They will drop dead with pleasure if they watch Bollywood movies if they get impressed with crap like this play.

MA

26/11 Anniversary

So today was the anniversary of the Mumbai terrorist attacks and I was recalling how I was right in the middle of it (well not in Oberoi or Taj but another hotel).

I was on a biz trip and when I was at the airport, news had started coming in already that there is something wrong with the flights to India and there would be a delay to all Mumbai flights. I remember I never thought at the time that it was due to something so major, I thought this was yet another Indian Airport related fkkup. So as the flight delayed even more, people actually inquired more and it was pretty evident what was the cause.

I was caught in 2 minds, whether I should just cancel the trip or just go ahead because as I always think "mujh jaise rakshas ladke ko kabhi kuch nahin ho sakta hai". I ended going ahead with the trip purely due to 1 reason. I was ball-less at that time (still the case!). I was worried about what my then boss would say and think so poorly of me (yes, he definitely would never thing that it is a genuine reason to cancel a trip!).

So the whole flight is pretty uneventful except the fact that I was getting worried that how would I go from airport to my hotel?! I doubt any cabs etc would be available. I checked my ticket, thankfully there was a pickup listed. But you never know, the hotel guys might say, fkk this guy, who cares...unlike me the driver might have the guts to value his life!

Anyway, I land, pickup is there with my name card! I sit, I try to chat the driver up if it is safe to go etc, he was like over confident "haan haan - koi vanda nahin, woh sab south mumbai mein ho raha hai, apun to highway pe hai, beech mein hai yeh hotel".
Ok...if he says so. The roads were empty, so his optimism wasn't being shared by many people i guess. Anyway about 1km from the hotel, there was a huge police barrier and they stopped up. Made me get out, checked my hotel tickets, luggage, there was a sniffer dog who was looking rather tired. The police then tell the cab driver to get lost. I was like what?!! Then what will I do. I have this luggage and I had no clue how far is the hotel (I later got to know it was around 1km). Police guy said, ok on your way, go on...walk...pointing me towards the direction.

I start walking...couple of guys were ahead of me at 400m types distance but otherwise it was an empty road at 11pm at night. I was thinking, I need a set of balls now, enough....I can't be dying in Mumbai of all the places!

Anyway I reach the hotel, operations were even tighter. Multiple dogs, security checks, no concierge. I guess all the five star hotels were in lock down mode. Anyway I checked in, reached my hotel, locked it etc...So then I thought, ok let's tub a bit. Chill, let's have a beer and sit in the tub. So as I am doing that, I hear a loud banging noise on my door. I ignored, rather I was too engrossed in my tubbing. Again, even louder banging. This time it was fkking scary. I was like "gaye beta...mara lo...KSML types...ok let me atleast wear some clothes". So i go to he door in that bath robe kinda thingie, shout out "who is it". No reply but just constant banging. I was like khol deta hoon before they shoot me! I open up and what do I find - 2 police guys and that sniffer son of a bitch again. I was like "fkk u guys, you gave me a heart attack....why didn't you answer when I asked who is it" They are like it is standard protocol, will happen in every 4 hours so be prepared.

It went the whole day, I was mostly hotel restricted, had only a couple of meetings and then returned. It was one of the scariest experiences of my life after trying to snorkel in Andaman!

MA

Watching cricket is no more fun-

The game has become too one sided in favor of the batsmen. Even miscued shots go for six because of extremely short boundaries and those huge heavy 2 inch thick bats. Bowlers are basically reduced to necessities because without them the game can't be played else they might not even exist.

Something has to change. Either the bats need to return to the older weight/built and the boundaries need to be longer. At least ensure that a shot which wasn't middled properly gets caught out instead of sailing over for six!

OR

Give the bowlers a choice as well on which balls they can choose etc. Like batsmen choose their own bats with different weight, thickness long handle/short handle etc, bowlers should be open to choose between red/white, how many overs old etc. There has to be some advantage given to them sooner than later to make it fairer else it is just a slug/slog fest.

MA

New Interest - Astrology

Have started following / reading / watching a lot of lectures on Astrology. Not surprisingly, it makes a lot of sense and quite surprisingly I am actually able to do a bit of reading myself now. I plan to take this up much more seriously but anyone who has no hesitations in sharing their Date of birth, Place of Birth and Time of Birth with me, I can get back to you with a reading (I guess more practice for me and free of charge, sensible and useful commentary for you)

MA

The next level of weight loss-

Given so many people read my first post "how to lose 350gms weight every week", I thought I should release my next theory which will fine tune the concept further.

It is essentially based around the fact that gymming needs to be used as a strategic tool rather than as an everyday / routine kind of activity. Our body has a carbohydrate bank (henceforth it will be referred to as CB in the post for my convenience) at any given point of time. The weight gain happens because the energy that the body is burning is far lesser than the energy stored in this CB. Now one thing needs to be mentioned here which is very important: CB is different than Fat and Protein calories. Eating equal amount of calories from Protein, Fat and Carbs leads to unequal weight gain (proven scientifically). The order of weight gain is Protein < Fat < Carbs.

Coming back to the point - so to lose weight, essentially one needs to keep CB in check (ideally 0 but that of course is not possible). The way to keep CB in check is to either eat no carbs or to exercise off the carbs every time you add any out of the ordinary amounts into your CB. Now here comes my revolutionary mind blowing theory. Our body has a hidden amount of CB energy. What does it mean? It is a concept similar to - why does steam at 100 degrees cause more burns than boiling water at exactly the same temperature? it is because steam contains some hidden heat which is called "latent" heat. Similarly, our body has a latent CB, so every time one decides to lose weight or start exercising, one does not see any weight loss for the first 2 weeks despite gymming our asses off! Because during those 2 weeks, the body is just burning that latent CB. Meanwhile due to gymming everyday, one feels more hungry (metabolism fastens up temporarily), eats more thinking that no harm in eating more because we gymmed today and the faster metabolism will burn it. It is here that the mistake lies in gymming everyday as routine - it just never lets the CB come down due to continuous extra eating and because one never flushes out the latent CB in the first place!

Solution - decide on a Saturday (of course after praying to the mighty lord of Saturn) that you want to lose weight in next 3-4 months. On that Saturday, don't do halka phulka mickey mouse exercises. Do a proper rigorous 2 hour cardio session and please for god's sake don't have any recovery drinks / snacks for muscle building or whatever bullshit you might have read (that stuff is for recovery of pro-soccer players...are you one? NO you are NOT). Rest for 5-6 hours and then go for a long walk, for some cycling, hiking...remember the aim is to bring that latent CB down to 0 before you can march on the path of weight loss.
Now comes Sunday, you would be feeling drained, YES great, that is a symptom of being on the right track. If you have a spring in your step on Sunday then that means your CB is huge and you need to work harder! Sunday you basically repeat what you did on Saturday. If not rigorous gymming, then basically go for a long hike. Key for these 2 days is not to add to any stuff to CB (so no recovery bars, energy bars, no bananas, no chocolates, no fruit juices, no desserts etc etc, you get the drift!) Just eat normal food, 3 times a day.

Now that CB is flushed, latent energy bank is at minimum, you basically have to keep calorie intake in check and that's it. DON'T gym unless you have cheated in your calorie intake through Carbs. If you went out drinking one night, then your goal is to burn those off within the next 24 hours. If you had 1 drink, then gym for 15 minutes. If you had 5 drinks, then you need to gym for an hour. If you had 10 then...join alcoholic anonymous, you have far more serious issues than weight problems!
You went out for an elaborate dinner coupled with desserts, you need to work out for an hour and a half. You have been sticking to the controlled diet, eating a good mix of proteins and fats with very less Carbs then you DON'T have to gym. I mean it, please do not jack up your metabolism temporarily which will end up making you eat more afterwards. Use the gym as a strategic tool to keep CB in check only.

MA


          

Why would Sachin do this?

This whole Sachin Tendulkar autobiography excerpts which have come out - it is so typical Sachin. I am not impressed with this sh%t. When he was in the team, he used to never come on record or take responsibility for anything meaningful, now suddenly he is opening secrets, talking on selective issues and expressing an "expert" opinion. His whole funda of proxy captaincy, running subtle hints from behind the scenes and "influencing" team members is a smart tactic but not my kind of thing. He is the greatest ODI batsman and top 3 Test batsmen ever without a doubt but he has had 2-3 pretty huge gaps in his list of achievements. The biggest according to me was his inability to perform together with captaincy. No one has shied away from captaincy and refused it as blatantly as Sachin in the modern history of the game - which is fine, he has his priorities set BUT it should take away his ability to run the team and proxy influencing it as well.

1) Most talked about Greg Chappell issue - he never spoke about it during that time, now suddenly he has an incident to come out with?! Either be Ganguly who took that guy head on right during his stint or be like Dravid who didn't speak then, nor wants to comment on it now

2) Kapil being a disappointment as a coach - again - what crap! why not give that feedback then so that next set of coaches are picked accordingly etc?

3) No comments on match fixing because I don't know enough - hahahaha seriously? it was happening all around you. Couple of your team mates were allegedly right in the thick of it and you have no comments?

4) Showing Ian Chappell the size of the mirror because you have played more tests than him - fair enough, how come you didn't have the balls to say this then in any interview?

I really like Sachin but all this autobiography nonsense just dilutes his brand - he was a solid, less talk, more action guy who was focused on one and only one thing, how to score the maximum amount of runs for India (mind you - not how to make India win). This image is getting hurt by all this post retirement stuff (he anyway fkked up a lot in his last couple of years pre-retirement). The lowest points of his playing career have been refusing captaincy time and again, his 100th hundred against Bangladesh and getting his 200th test fixed against West Indies at home. The lowest points of his non playing career have been selling that Ferrari which he got as a gift (after India customs let go off the excise duties!) and now this autobiography.

MA