Sunday, 11 January 2009

Pigeon vs Peacock...

Before I even start this post, 3 ppl mentioned in the post apart from me are real life and have been some of my very few good friends. If you read this, the post is only for being funny and coz I met two of you very recently and remembered this incident. Don't get mad please :)

This is a story of 4 friends, all from Electrical Deptt 04 batch:

Himanshu: Army background, pseud bugger. He had interests and hobbies in Military Aviation and other such nonsense. He could talk only in English and had an heavy UK accent. He would greet parents with Hello Maam, Sir...extremely scared of his dad (we would often see semi wet stained jeans the next day in college). He was fondly called scooby-doo, you can imagine why.

Nikhil: Akshay Khanna of Dil Chahta Hai. Spoke less. Would generally consider a time waste to argue with ppl. Had only 1 line quips which were super funny and make the other person person feel ashamed of their wits. Had rock solid opinions (though never expressed) and almost knew everything to know on this planet

Naresh: (he is the main protagonist of the story) Jat Bhai from Jind Haryana, pehlwan budhi. Could think only in terms of violence, isko uthwa dein, hamari jaan pehchan hai, koi problem hai to batao. Funny guy and he had a special relationship (not the Dostana kinds...well at that time we didn't know dostana) with Nikhil of the kind where both could only irritate each other and end of arguing where obviously Nikhil won 100% times

Mayur: 4th guy. The dorky weird walk style fellow whose nose size was often the butt of their jokes. Perenial bored expression on his face and the often running nose reduced what he thought was his dynamite style of dressing

Lecture: BioMedical, Prof: Madari, Lecture just started, first lecture in the morning

Backbench, 4 frnds sitting. Naresh had his lunch already open, gobi ki sabzi. Himanshu desperately trying to get me and Nikhil shut up and not discuss Roy Keane's greatness (only guy Nikhil respects in the whole world)

Madari: (super nasal voice) Nikammo, 4 khote last bench wale subah subah tum log bak bak kar rahe ho. Attendance short kar doon. 74.5% pe atka doonga, yahin reh jayegi tumhari degree. Peon mantality hai tumhari. incorrigible fools...chal 4 sawaal kar do zara assignment ke liye...

Naresh: Peacock...Peacock....(loudly)

Mayur: ??????
Nikhil: Peacock????
Himanshu: Peacock??????!!!
Everyone: Where Where??!!??

Naresh points. Silence......

Nikhil: Falls off the bench laughing...Naresh: confused...starts getting irritated
Mayur: Saale, pigeon hai yeh...peacock!!!!
Himanshu: puzzled, had an expression "i don't believe i am associated with these morons"
Nikhil: Naresh yaar sparrow hi bol deta, peacock!!!
Everyone: laughing, hysterical

Madari: amused but no he had to do his usual dialogue baazi. Nikamme, yeh tak to tujhe pata nahin hai. Engineer kya khaak banega. Naukri kaise lagi teri, sifarish lagayi hogi tune zaroor!

Naresh: embarassed, tries to hide below the desk (atleast so what we thought). Comes out with a bang carrying his helmet and bammmm there goes a dislocated shoulder for Nikhil! looking at Himanshu and me. whom to hit next. Nikhil still laughing, pisses Naresh off even more. One more shot from gadhadhari bhim on to Nikhil.

Nikhil: Acha chod na, kyun gussa ho raha hai. Chal let't eat your lunch "Ladyfinger".

Naresh: doesn't react.

Nikhil looks at me, and at Himanshu: Oh sh&t he does think it is ladyfinger. Dude!!! :D :D more smiles from all of us

Himanshu: Brinjal, let's eat brinjal.

Naresh: realising, it is neither and wtf is it called. he definitely needs a crash course on vegetables together with birds and animals. even more pissed off.

Lecture over. Naresh still very hurt by the fact that "class ki ladkiyon ke aage nahin banta tha yaar yeh, dosti mein alag baat hai but bhai ki izzat tumne class mein utaar di)

Nikhil: Comes up with a brilliant idea. How abt we just revise all these in the canteen today so that it never happens again. Shoots a glance to Himanshu and Mayur. Himanshu amused, good time pass. Nikhil grinning.
Naresh: innocently, ok yes done hai.

Canteen: 4 cold coffees and 3 extremely sincere profs and 1 innocent student

Nikhil: Ok let's start with vegetables. bhindi?
Naresh: Ladyfinger ofcourse( thought time 1 second)....kya baat kar di yaar...bhai ko kya yeh bhi nahin pata hoga

Nikhil: baigan:
Naresh: brinjal (thought time 2 seconds)...btw turnip kya hota hai phir?
Himanshu: ??? hmmm he doesn't know the hindi name
Nikhil: shalgam bccc...looks at Himanshu: angrez ki aulaad...missile ke siwai kuch aur bhi pata hai tujhko!

Naresh: tum jyada hero ban rahe ho, lemme ask a few...ghiya..Nikhil: gourd (thought time 1.2 milisecond)...Naresh: petha...Nikhil: pumpkin (thought time 2 milisecond)...Naresh: Karela...

Nikhil: hmmm hamare ghar mein nahin banta hai!
Naresh: bc peacock to jaise tum log roz hi padte ho!...phat gayi ab...

Himanshu: bitter his UK accent
Naresh: ok now comes the real test...saunf ko kya bolte hain?
Himanshu: Fenugreek (thought time 0.1 milisecond)...smugg...Naresh: whatttt...impressed...
Jai himanshu baba...Jai himanshu baba...
Himanshu: dehatiyon agar bakwaas khatam ho gayi ho to samosa kha ke aayein...

We have never had more fun. I miss you guys. Met with Nikhil and Naresh last week in Delhi.

Just as update on the 4 guys:

Himanshu: In Atlanta, working for an IT firm. Is still pseud, is still puppy and last heard greeted the strippers at strip bar with "Hello Maam, hwo are you doing...pleasure is all mine"

Naresh: Working with a financial services firm in Delhi. FYI writes only all English mails and has tamed down on his violent streak

Nikhil: Working with Samsung in Delhi. Still taking Naresh's case on peacocks and sparrows. Still only talks with witty one liners shredding you to bare bones. Still supporting the damn ManU club

Mayur: Working in HK. Still has that bored expression though smiling today writing this. Still has a running long nose BUT moth$%fkkers now my walk has improved :D



  1. great to read this post. college ke din yaad aa gaye. Those were really the best days!

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  3. @ Achs: thanks for the comments dude...tried seeing ur profile...sorry but couldn't gather who you are...

  4. mayur!!! it was lovely..the most interesting piece i read in a long long time..had tears in my eyes by laughing out so loud!! n the character sketch of each is just perfect!!naresh's more psrticularly was really funny!! i know well wat expression himanshu wd have had wen he said "fenugreek" or wen the cheat said "plesure's all mine"!!! anyway, gud job! u sure have a talent for writing! keep it up! ruby

  5. n ya, at least till the last time i saw..the nose was just as bad and the walk even worse!

  6. @ruby: thanku haiga...should be writing few more stuff soon...falling short of stories:)